My count is wrong!?

On many occasions, my male friends and students tell me the same scenarios - during a dance, the lady tells the guy his count is wrong. Some lady tries to “help” or “correct” the situation by leading the guy, which normally doesn’t work out well. Sometimes it got so bad, they got completely pissed off with each other and walked off the dance floor. This is not what we have in mind when we go dancing and expect nothing but lots of fun!

Is this a man-only problem? Since the guy is doing the leading, the lady only has to follow, right? Well, not exactly; It is correct to expect the leader to have to lead accordingly to the music being played, and the lady to follow. This is the basic structure of Couple (or Partner) dance, leader and follower are “connected” by hands and body contacts. More often than not, dancers didn’t pay enough attention to “connection” (will be discussed in depth in a separate article). Even if the man can’t lead with the exact accurate beat, the follower should still maintain the connection throughout the duration of the dance.

An experienced lady dancer can actually provide solid feedback to the leader, thus reinforcing the leader with more accent and timing. This is why when leading a female teacher, men with not-so-accurate count can still lead correctly and smoothly. When dancing with a leader who is weak on count, the lady should focus on the connection through hands, provide support and encouragement to the leader, and avoid the urge to correct the leader.Not only that, the man’s ego can really get bruised when he is being challenged, especially while he is not feeling secure.

Now let’s look at the situation of the man. Some might say that majority of male Salsa dancers can keep a count; but I must say the reason is because those who can’t keep count simply stop dancing, or won’t even walk close to the dance floor! This is not desirable, we need guys with two-left-feet to get over the hurdle and enjoy the fun of dancing. Taking lesson from good teacher is always important; not only learning the steps, routines, tricks, but also the Salsa Musicality. Whenever possible, practice with teachers, friends, or someone that is less critical. Even if you feel confident with your ability, still have a teacher check and make correction as needed. Solo practice with music is always good, which builds up connection between music and movement.

Here are several tips for men when dancing with someone who complain about your lead:

1. Distraction. Initiate a conversation, which will shift the focus immediately.

2. Turns. Spin the lady (if capable) more, which makes the lady dizzy and loose the count herself.

3. Speed Up. Dancing slowly amplify the inaccuracy, speeding up the tempo (although still not accurate) makes it less apparent.

4. Switch-Lead. Ask the lady to lead with the proper beat. More often than not, the lady is willing to help, as long as man’s ego is not in the way.

5. Shine. Separate and do some solo moves (if capable) and reconnect.

Salsa Dance is not just the steps, it is also the music. Gaining more understanding about Salsa music will advance the dance itself. Its rhythm, its melody, and its mood. It is the music+dance combination makes Salsa exciting and attractive. For folks who didn’t grow up with the music, it is never too late to start listening to the music and acquire the steps. With a good teacher and sufficient practice, keep correct count while dancing to Salsa music can be achieved in no time.

About the author

Don was born & raised in Taiwan, ran high-tech start-up company in Silicon Valley, USA for many years. Have been dancing ballroom Latin, Salsa for 15 years.  Now based in Shanghai, teaching & performing with partner Cindy. http://www.magicsalsa.com